I Miss Your Smiles
by JuniorArtist
Summary: Allen and Lavi were childhood friends. But after an incident, Allen changed and Lavi swore to bring the boy’s true smile back. Will he be able to do it before it becomes too late? AU Laven
1. I Miss Your Smiles

**Taaadaaaa! I'm back! And yes! I'm doing a Laven story. But don't worry. I have Yullen story in mind but I still haven't thought about it yet that much.**

**First of all, I would like to thank all of you who supported my other fic, A Long Lost Memory. I really love how it turned out.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen and Lavi and Kanda and so on. But I would like to own a doll of them to cuddle with at night! XD**

**And now presenting…**

**Summary:** Allen and Lavi were childhood friends and they had fun together. But after an incident, Allen suddenly changed and Lavi swore to bring the boy's true smile back. Will he be able to do it before it becomes too late? AU Laven

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**I Miss Your Smiles**

"_Aka-chan!" a 10 year-old white-haired boy called as he smiled and waved._

Click.

"_Aka-chan! Come back here!" an angry white-haired boy shouted as he chased an older red-haired boy._

Click.

"_Hahaha! Aka-chan! You look like an idiot!" the same boy said as he again laughed hard and almost fell off the chair._

"_Hey! That's not a word for a ten year old kid like you to use! And stop laughing at me!" a voice said annoyed._

Click.

"_Thank you Mana!" the white haired boy said as he tackle-hugged the man beside him._

_The boy then turned his head at his right which allows it to be in the view while still hugging the man. "And to you too, Aka-chan. Thank you! This is the best day of my life! I hope we stay like this forever!" the boy then flashed his best smile to the one he is talking to and then everything stopped._

In a dark room with a little light coming from the television, a teenager with red-hair stared hard at the TV screen showing a smiling face of a cute little white-haired boy.

The red-haired teen then pulled out his wallet from his pants. He opened it and took a picture out and stared at it with unfocused eyes. It is an old photograph of two laughing little boys.

"_Aka-chan! Hurry! I want to ride the Ferris wheel!" a 10 year-old white-haired boy called as he smiled brightly._

"_Hai! Coming, Shiro-chan!" Lavi, a 13year-old boy with bight red hair replied as he approached the younger boy._

"_Mana! You, too! Hurry or we will not catch the fireworks while riding the ferris wheel" Shiro-chan complained and pouted at his father._

"_But before that, I would like to take a picture of you two together to remember this event." Mana started to rummaged inside his bag for the camera as the two boys stood side by side, the ferris wheel behind them as a background._

"_Okay. Got the camera. Are you boys ready? On the count of three. One, two.." Mana counted._

_But before the count of three was heard, chibi-Lavi placed his right arms around Shiro-chan's shoulder and tickled the boy's side using the other hand. Shiro-chan then laughed. His sweet and angelic laugh resonates at the surroundings._

"_Three." Click._

"_Aka-chan! That's not fair! Who told you to tickle me at my side?!" Shiro-chan complained as he lightly punched the older boy at his arm._

"_Haha! Sorry. I really love your laugh so I can't help it." Chibi-Lavi said as he smiled at the boy._

"_Okay, that's enough. Let's head for the ferris wheel then we can eat dinner" Mana then ushered the two boys towards the said ride._

"I really missed your laughs, Shiro-chan," An 18 year old Lavi said as he stared sadly at the picture of a chibi version of Shiro-chan and himself with the ferris wheel as the background.

A soft knock was then heard at the door but Lavi didn't move, as if he didn't hear the

knock.

"Lavi-san, you should leave for school right away, otherwise you will be late for class," the man said who poked his head inside the dark room.

"I'll be right there." Lavi stand up and returned the picture inside his wallet and turned the television off. He then walked towards the door.

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**Aka – red**

**Shiro – white**

**Just leave a review if you feel like it. But doing so will make me really happy. ^_^**


	2. Formality

**I didn't know what to say. I was so shocked to see 13 reviews for 1 chapter. But before that, I would like to add something.**

**Warning: sorry to say but, this fic will contain shounen-ai, you know, boyxboy but don't worry. I'm not writing any lemon. So, if anyone is offended by this, or does not like it.. feel free to push the back button. Thanks.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own DGM but, speaking of that, have you heard the real reason behind the hiatus of the manga? Well, apparently, hoshino-sensei was sued(?) because he copied a character that was made by another mangaka. So that's why the length of the hiatus is undetermined.**

**Thank you very much to all that dropped their reviews, made this fic to their favorites, alerts, etc. I really appreciated it.**

**And now presenting…**

**Summary:** Allen and Lavi were childhood friends and they had fun together. But after an incident, Allen suddenly changed and Lavi swore to bring the boy's true smile back. Will he be able to do it before it becomes too late? AU Laven

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**I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 2: Formality**

"Shiro-chan!" Lavi called as he hugs a certain white-haired boy from behind.

"Please, don't call me that. We're not kids anymore. Call me Walker, Bookman-san."

Allen said as he removed Lavi's arms around him and walked towards the school building.

_That Walker crap again. Never gonna happen._

"When did I ever listen to you, Allen-chan?" Lavi said as he walked beside the boy, pushing the hurt feeling behind the back of his mind and heart.

After five years, the close relationship between Allen and Lavi had changed but the older one was trying his best to return those happy moments of his life. However, Allen is also doing his best to prevent Lavi from doing that.

"Never. But still, I kept telling you this past five years that if you don't want to call me by my surname, at least remove the chan thing after my first name" Allen turned to open his locker and fetch the things he needed for class.

"Sorry. It's just hard to call you different name when I am used in calling you Shiro-chan. But at least I'm trying, _Allen_" Lavi said the name as if he was poisoned by just mentioning it..

"That's better. Thank you." The two boys then walked towards their classroom.

Allen, eventhough three years younger than Lavi, is already at the same year as him. The white-haired boy is a genius (well, that's what Lavi kept saying to everyone). His level of intelligence can already take him to college level but Allen chose to be in the same year as Lavi for some unknown reason.

Lavi and Allen are always on the top of their year (actually, it's allen since he's always number 1 and Lavi is always number 2). The two boys ignored the competition being thrown at them by their teachers because eventhough they have different personalities, they still both share a common trait, they don't give a damn about their grades. Lavi is a happy-go-lucky person and likes to have fun with his friends than to study. While Allen is a kind of serious kid, sometimes smiling but still serious about anything and everything, except studying.

"Yuu-chan!" Lavi shouted as he entered the room and spotted a long raven haired guy sitting at the back.

The man named Yuu-chan looked at the pair then immediately turned his head the opposite direction, ignoring the two.

"Hey! Don't be a snob! I just wanted to greet you a good morning" Lavi said as he slipped to his chair beside the grumpy guy.

"What good is a morning if there is an usagi to greet you?" the Japanese retorted.

"Morning, Kanda-san" Allen greeted as he seated himself infront of Lavi's desk which

was beside the window,

"Not you too, moyashi" Kanda glared at the boy.

Allen just smiled as Kanda continued to glare at him which made Lavi's eyes turned away from the younger boy's obvious fake smile.

_Again, that smile. One day, I swear that I'll pull out of you that true sweet smile of yours._ Lavi's thoughts were interrupted as the door infront of the class was opened to reveal a girl with a dark green two ponytailed hair come in, with a teacher in tow.

"okay, class. Go back to your seats. You have a new classmate and I want you to be good at her, understood?" the teacher said as he tapped his hands at the board to get everyone's attention.

"Please, introduce yourself to them, Lenalee" the teacher gave an encouraging smile at the girl who was observing the class.

"Good morning. I'm Lenalee Lee. I just got here last week and will be studying here until I graduate from high school" Lenalee said as she slightly bowed at the silent students.

"Wait!" Lavi shouted from the back and stood up." Lee? As in _the_ Lee? The one spelled like Mr. Komui's surname?" Everyone's attention was now flickering from Lavi to the new girl's direction.

"Yes. Actually, Komui is my brother" Lenalee confirmed with a smile.

"So, you're supposed to be the cute little Lenalee who was always clinging at Komui-sensei's side all the time?" Lenalee blushed deep red as everyone, including the teacher stared at her, waiting for an answer.

"I.. I'm not who I used to be I don't cling to brother anymore. I've changed _forcefully_" Lenalee said the last word in his mind as she stared straight into Allen's eyes.

_Not who I used to be, huh. Just like someone I know. _Lavi glanced at Allen's direction.

Allen's hair at the back of his neck stood up at the gaze Lenalee was giving him. _No, that can't be right. Why should I be afraid of her? She's only a girl and a new student to boot._ Allen then turned his head towards the window, breaking the eye contact and calming himself in the process.

"Okay kids. Let's stop here and proceed with our lesson." The teacher faced Lenalee and said," Would you mind if you were seated at the back? Besides, it's the only vacant seat left."

"No! not at all! I love to sit at the back. Besides, the people sitting there looks kind of interesting." Lenalee made her way towards the back of the room and seated himself beside Allen and infront of Kanda.

"Nice meeting you, Allen Walker-san. My brother told me everything about you." The girl smiled and stretched her hand to Allen.

Allen stared at her stretched hand. He didn't know what to do, but since he was raised as a gentleman, he shook it and welcomed the girl to their class.

"Yeah. I'll sure be enjoying my stay here." The girl said smirking.

Lavi and Kanda saw the smirk on the new girl's face before it was gone. They looked at each other and then at Allen who was now unconsciously hugging himself as if he was cold.

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**Thank you for correcting me. I already changed Akai to Aka-chan. **

**Just leave a review if you feel like it. But doing so will make me really happy. And if I ever get many reviews again, I might update this faster. ^_^**


	3. the past that can't be changed

**I have my final exam today and before that, I can't help but update this. So, wish me all the luck!**

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews you gave me last chapter. It really motivated me to write, write and write! But I still hate typing. Haha!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei.**

**

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I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 3: the Past that Can't be Changed**

One week after the arrival of Lenalee, the trio now becomes quadruplets. The new girl followed the three everywhere. Lavi and Kanda are getting annoyed. Allen on the other hand, still can't set aside the uneasiness feeling he felt whenever the girl is with them. But the three didn't push her away. Instead, they just pretend that everything is alright.

"Hey! Here comes the dream team!" one of the students shouted as the four entered the cafeteria.

The small group was considered dream team because of their popularity. Allen and Lavi, well are on the top of their year. Kanda, despite his looks is also on the top and is also the son of the principal, Froi Tiedol. The last member of the so-called dream team is the sister of the infamous crazy (that's what the students call him) Komui-sensei.

" I wish I was Lenalee. I've been dreaming to hang out with the three boys ever since I laid my eyes on them" one of the girl dreamily said.

As always, Allen ordered three extra large meals for his appetite. While his friends settled on ordering normal meal, well except for Kanda because he only ordered soba for his meals.

"Say Allen, what happened to your face? I've been asking you that for a week and still you haven't answered me" Lenalee said as she started eating her salad.

"_I'll leave you that scar so that you won't forget me. Don't worry, I'll come back for you, soon."_

"We..Well. It's," Allen started.

"Why do you care if he has some weird tattoo on his face?! It's none of your business and who are you to ask that to Allen?! You're new here and you don't know anything about him!" Lavi slammed his hands on the table and stood up before Allen could say anything else. He always looses his cool whenever someone question Allen about his face and his past. One thing he doesn't want Allen to do was to remember those horrible times of his life.

Allen put his hand over Lavi's shoulder. The older teen turned his head towards the younger one. Allen slowly shook his head. "it's alright. I don't mind anyway. It's always like this so I'm used to it by now."

Lavi clenched his fists and walked out from the cafeteria, making all the heads of the students in there followed him.

Kanda, who were silent throughout the whole incident decided to make his move. He stood up leaving his untouched soba on the table. "Let's go, moyashi."

Kanda, eventhough looks like he didn't care anything about the world, have really soft spot for his two friends. When someone bullies them, he was always on the rescue. And even if he was the same age as Lavi, he was the one who always looks after the two. He often bickers with them but the truth is, he is the overprotective brother of the two.

"But.. Kanda-san, I'm not yet finished" Allen complained as he looked at the Japanese teen and to his half eaten meal.

"I'll buy you outside so leave it." Kanda started to walk away but suddenly stopped. He looked at Lenalee who was about to stand and said, 'Don't follow us."

Allen made a defeated sigh and followed his Japanese friend walked out from the cafeteria.

Lenalee just looked at the two retreating teens and smiled. _Don't think you could get away just by doing this._

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"Why does she always ask Allen about his past? Doesn't she know that asking someone like that can hurt their feelings? Damn it!" Lavi punched the tree many times until his fist started to bleed.

"_Shiro-chan!" chibi-Lavi shouted as he was pushed away by the policeman. "Let go! Let me through!"_

_The house of the Walker family was full of policemen. Chibi-Lavi was supposed to sleepover at the place but when he arrived, he was shocked at what he saw._

_The living room was covered with blood. Fresh blood. And in the middle of the room, there lay two bodies, Mana and chibi-Allen._

_Mana was hugging chibi-Allen over his chest while the boy was hugging the man back, obviously frightened of something earlier._

_Chibi-Lavi stood there for five whole minutes, body stiff and mind blank. Then he was pulled back to reality when he saw a movement coming from the boy._

_Chibi-Lavi's body was able to move again and run towards the phone, calling the police, medics and his grandfather. After that. He returned to the living room and _

_slowly pulled chibi-Allen out from Mana's hold._

_Mana's body was starting to get cold and stiff. When chibi-Lavi freed chibi-Allen from his father's protective hug, he turned the boy's body to look at his face, and he again was stunned._

_Chib-Allen's beautiful and innocent face was now bloody and on the left side of it, the flesh was now visible because of the large cut that started from the upper left portion of his forehead down to his eye and then to his cheek._

_Chibi-Allen grunted and slowly opened his eye (yes, eye. Coz' the other was well, covered with blood). He saw chibi-Lavi crying and slowly moved his hand to reach the older boy's cheek. Chibi-Lavi was surprised at the contact and looked at chibi-Allen with full of sorrow._

"_A.. Aka-Ch.. Chan" chibi-Allen said weakly before everything else went black._

_That was the last time chibi-Lavi heard chibi-Allen called him by that name because after the boy went limp, the policemen started barging into the mansion and pulling chibi-Lavi away from the boy. Away from chibi-Allen._

"Bookman-san" Lavi's shoulders stiffened upon hearing that name. He didn't want to hear it coming from Allen's mouth. What he wants was to go back to the past, where Allen was still Shiro-chan.

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**Aaaaaaaaaannnndd cut!**

**Just leave a review if you feel like it. But doing so will make me really happy. ^_^**


	4. the unique smile you had

**I'm back after being cast-off to a boring place for two weeks!**

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews you gave me last chapter. It reallymotivated me to write, write and write! But I still hate typing. So finished chapters are still sleeping in my notebook. Haha!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei.**

**I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 4: the unique smile you had**

Allen followed Kanda as he walked out of the cafeteria and head towards the garden. Kanda was sure that Lavi is there because whenever this incident happen, their red-haired friend will go there to bring his cool back by breathing fresh air and relaxing his mind.

"Kanda-san" Allen said, head down and uncertain what ir running in the head of his Japanese friend.

Kanda abruptly stopped walking making Allen bumped into him. He then turned around to face the younger one.

"You. You really don't care do you?" Kanda said angrily. Allen stared at his friend, confused. He didn't know what he had done for Kanda to be mad at him. He just stopped Lavi from killing Lenalee, so what is the problem about that?

"I.. I don't know what you are talking about. I don't.." but Allen was interrupted by a hand that was placed on his head.

Kanda sighed and looked at Allen straight in the eyes. "Lavi. He's just worried about you. You're not good at expressing yourself especially if it comes to being angry so he's doing that in your place."

"But I didn't ask him to. I didn't ask anyone to do that. I'm fine. Really. I told you already that I'm used to it so it's okay" Allen defended himself.

Kanda withdrew his hand from Allen's head and used it to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Listen, kid. Those things are okay with you but not to Lavi. Eventhough he looks like a good-for-nothing jolly bastard, he cares, deeply especially if it concerns you. So do you understand now? Do you want to see him miserable?"

Allen averted his eyes from Kanda and slowly shook his head. "but why? Why does he care so much?" Kanda eyebrow twitched and put his hand on Allen's cheek and pinch it.

"He's your friend or do you need another reason?" Allen again shook his head.

"Good. Come on, let's go and fetch the usagi then we can go to the restaurant and eat" Kanda said as he draped his arm over Allen's shoulders.

After a while of bunny hunting, they spotted a flaming red hair at the distance, back facing them and continuously punching a tree.

Allen suddenly stopped walking, uncertain what to do to ease Lavi's anger. But Kanda, as if he read Allen's mind whispered to him. "You don't have to do anything. Just be there for him. That's enough." Then Kanda gently pushed the boy's back causing Allen to stumble forward.

Allen looked back at Kanda and mouthed a thank you and slowly walked towards Lavi.

"Bookman-san" Lavi's shoulders stiffened as Allen called him. "I.. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.." but Allen was cut short when Lavi turned around and hugged him tightly.

"It's alright. You don't have to apologize. It's me who should say sorry. I mean, it's not my place to be angry when someone asked you something that concerns Mana."

Allen, upon hearing the name of his late father, hugged Lavi back and silently cried over his chest. Lavi patted Allen's back and continued doing that for a while.

Kanda, who was standing in a distance, watched the two with a little hint of hurt and jealousy in his eyes.

"_Yuu-chan! How are you feeling?" a chibi-Lavi asked as he tackle-hugged his friend._

"_Get off!" Chibi-Kanda tried to push his so-called friend off of him but the other had a tight grip on him. "And who the hell told you that I'm sick?!"_

"_You're father told me that you got a fever so here I am, being a good friend and making sure that you are now better" chibi-Lavi said cheerfully._

_Chibi-Kanda struggled to get free from chibi-Lavi's embrace and finally won. He then gave his so-called friend a death glare. "I'm fine now so get out before I kill you with Mugen."_

"_That threat again? I'm used to that already you know. Besides, a true swordsman never uses their swords on their friends" chibi-Lavi said with a shrug._

"_Is that a dare? 'coz you know I won't back down" chibi-Kanda stood up and proceeded into his closet and pulled out a thin sword._

_Chibi-Lavi sweatdropped as he saw what chibi-Kanda pulled out from his closet and then run at the corner. "No! I was only kidding! I'm just really here to give you my notes and tell you about our homework" chibi-Lavi said as he placed his hands infront of him in a surrendering gesture._

_Chibi-Kanda ignored the pleading look chibi-Lavi is giving him and instead unsheathed his sword from the scabbard. Chibi-Lavi's face becomes pale upon realizing that Kanda is serious about killing him and run towards the door. But before he could even touch the doorknob, chibi-Kanda already swung his sword at him. Luckily, chibi-Lavi didn't get injured but his bag was unluckily cut in half, causing his things to scatter on the floor._

_Chibi-Lavi immediately picked up all his things and run at the door. "I'll never visit you when you're sick because you're being posses by an evil spirit!" chibi-Lavi said before he closed the door. "I'll leave my notes at you butler."_

_Chibi-Kanda returned his sword in its scabbard and replaced it in his closet. When he was about to go back to bed and rest, he noticed a notebook on the floor._

"_That idiot forgot his notebook." Chibi-Kanda picked it up and opened it to see what subject was written on it but something fell from it. He picked it up and turned it around._

_There, he saw the most beautiful and innocent face he ever saw. Staring back at him was an image of two apparently laughing children. One was chibi-Lavi and the other was a white-haired boy with silver eyes. The photo was obviously taken in a theme park seeing that there is a ferris wheel behind them._

_Chibi-Kanda couldn't help but to stare at the younger boy. He was like an angel sent by heaven to live with them, humans. And there, at that moment. Kanda Yuu knew that he fell in love. The overlyprotective brother was in love with Allen Walker._

_

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_**Hahaha! Yeah I know! it sucks but I'm an avid Yullen fan so I can't help but to put a little Yullen in my Laven story. And I think its cute. XD**

**Just leave a review if you feel like it. But doing so will make me really happy. ^_^**


	5. to bring the smile back

**Wow! This story of mine just reached 1000 hits and it is just the 4****th**** chapter. Anyway, I will be giving you this chapter as a gift because while some of you are starting to get excited on getting a vacation, I am sorry to say that my classes starts tomorrow. But look at the bright side, it will be my last year in school and then I will be journeying to the real world soon.. whooo.. I am sooo nervous..**

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews you gave me last chapter.**

**Ican'tDenyYou**** – hahaha.. I love you too.. thank you.**

**Aion Laven Walker****, ****Epic Pose****, ****whisperypath**** – I'm happy that you liked it. ^_^**

**glon morski**** – hmm.. I think I should have really put a warning sign about OOCness in this story. Sorry about that. About the other question, I honestly haven't thought about that yet. Hahaha!**

**MonElisa**** – uhm.. does my excessive use of the word 'chibi' bothers you that much? I just love that word so I can't help it. But thanks for pointing it out. ^_^ about the grammar thingy, I'm still working on it.**

**Shikamarurules1**** – Don't worry. I don't plan doing a complicated love problem here. I just can't live without Yullen so I thought why not add it here? XD**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei.**

**I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 5: to bring the smile back**

"Look. Your hand is all bloody" Allen scolded Lavi as he cleaned his wound.

"Sorry. I didn't realized I was making a mess." Lavi then turned his head towards Kanda who was sitting in another bed, pleading for help.

The trio is now at the infirmary. They decided to tend to Lavi's wound before cutting in their classes and go to the restaurant to eat. The nurse offered to do the job but Allen insisted the he can do it so in the end, the nurse left the three alone in the room.

"Che. You bring it to yourself so be an adult and face the consequences attached to it" Kanda said as he looked at Allen who was absorbed at what he was doing.

Kanda knows that his love was one-sided so he decided to keep it to himself and be a protective big brother of his two idiotic (actually, it's only one) friends. Being near Allen as a friend is better than being ignored and avoided because of his selfish wish. Besides, there is only one wish he wanted to be fulfilled no matter what.

"_Oi usagi! You forgot this in my room yesterday." Chibi-Kanda placed the notebook he saw yesterday on the floor of his room._

"_Thanks, Yuu. But can I ask you something?" chibi-Lavi asked shyly with a hint of red on his cheeks._

"_What?"_

"_Well I've got this precious thing and I was wondering if you have seen it." Chibi-Lavi said sadly._

_Chibi-Kanda eyed chibi-Lavi suspiciously. He had never seen his friend act like this before. So what is this precious thing he is talking about?_

"_I've been looking for it since last night and I already turned out house upside down but still, I can't find it."_

"_What exactly are you looking for anyway?" chibi-Kanda was now annoyed because chibi-Lavi was saying things in circles and is not going straight to the point._

"_W.. Well. It's like this" chibi-Lavi moved his hands to indicate that he was looking for a rectangular shape thing "And it contains something that is very precious to me" chibi-Lavi said as soft as a whisper._

_Chibi-Kanda upon realizing what his friend was trying to point out, he slammed his hands over chibi-Lavi's desk causing the red-hair to slightly stumble backwards. "What the hell, Yuu!"_

"_you're looking for this, right?" chibi-Kanda said as he showed the photograph he found at his room._

"_That's.. Thank you Yuu-chan! You're the best!" chibi-Lavi tackle-hugged his friend as he snatched away the photo from chibi-Kanda's grip._

_At first, chibi-Kanda was reluctant at returning the photo to his friend because he knew that he could get another copy from the other boy he is with in the picture. But his resolved shattered upon seeing his friend's sad face. But still, the picture is not his and besides, he already made a copy of it so he doesn't really bother him if he return it._

_Chibi-Lavi was so happy because finally, the picture was returned to him. He was so sure that the younger boy will be upset if he found out that he lost it but thanks to Yuu-chan, everything was now back to normal._

"_Hey!" chibi-Lavi's cheerful dancing was interrupted when chibi-Kanda called him. "Who's the other boy?"_

"_Huh? You mean him?" chibi-Lavi pointed his finger at the image of a laughing chibi-Allen._

"_Who else, idiot?"_

"_This, my good friend is my most precious person." Chibi-Kanda noticed something in chibi-Lavi's eyes as the other stared at the image of a white-haired boy._

"_I know! Why don't you come with me after school? I'll introduce him to you." Chibi-Kanda was not a person who loves to hang out when school has ended but since chibi--Lavi offered to introduce the angel he so wanted to meet, how can he decline the offer, right?_

_So after school has ended, the two rode a public bus and then walked to get to the Walker estate._

_Chibi-Kanda was astounded at the size of the land the Walkers have. The mansion was so big and the garden was so huge and well-kept. Simply speaking, his angel was still living in heaven despite being sent on earth._

_Chibi-Lavi pushed the doorbell and shortly afterwards, someone opened the door._

"_good afternoon, Master Lavi. Come in and make yourself at home. I'll call Master Allen." The butler bowed and gestured his hand towards the living room._

_Chibi-Lavi pulled chibi-Kanda inside with him and sat at the couch comfortably. After a minute or so of waiting, they heard someone's voice._

"_Aka-chan!" chibi-Allen called as he appeared at the door._

_Chibi-Kanda thought that his heart stopped beating for a while before it returned to normal. The angel he saw at the picture is much more beautiful in person._

"_Hey! Shiro-chan!" chibi-Lavi called back as he outstretched his arms at the boy, inviting him for a hug._

_Chibi-Allen run at chibi-Lavi and tackle-hugged his friend. "I've missed you! You haven't visited me for a week so I thought you already forgotten about me."_

"_Nah.. never gonna happen. How can I forget someone as cute as you?" chibi-Lavi said as he hugged chibi-Allen tighter._

_A cough was heard from a distance._

"_Aka-chan, I can't breathe" chibi-Allen complained as he pushed his older friend._

_A much louder cough was then heard from a distance. _

_Chibi-Lavi and chibi-Allen turned their heads towards the direction of the sound. Chibi-Lavi then remembered that he was there to introduce chibi-Kanda to chibi-Allen._

"_Oh, yeah. I almost forgot. I went here with my friend to tell you that I'm going to be late for the sleepover. Panda is being an ass complaining that my room could be compared to a garbage dump and I have to clean it before going here. And also, I want to introduce to you, my one and only best friend, Yuu-chan." Chibi-Lavi gestured his hand towards chibi-Kanda and chibi-Allen's eyes followed it._

_Chibi-Allen slowly walked towards chibi-Kanda who was now still as a rock. "Uhmm. Can I also call you, Yuu-chan?" chibi-Allen asked shyly._

_Chibi-Kanda hated people who call him by his given name. he preferred Kanda than Yuu but one person was now exception to the rule. The reason? Because eventhough how many times he threatened and tried to kill a certain usagi for calling him Yuu-chan, the other still doesn't get what he wants to imply. So the only solution he got was to give up._

"_Uh? Yeah.. You can call me that" chibi-Kanda's face was now tinted red as he talked back to the boy._

"_That's not fair! I've waited for years before you finally allowed me to call you Yuu-chan. How come Shiro-chan's different" chibi-Lavi whined._

_Chibi-Allen looked back at chibi-Lavi and returned his gaze at chibi-Kanda and then suddenly laughed. Chibi-Kanda swore that that was the first time he heard someone laugh like that, so innocent and pure._

"_Hahaha! My name's Allen. Allen Walker. Nice meeting you, Yuu-chan! I hope we become great friends." Chibi-Allen said it with a smile._

That was the first and the last time Kanda saw Allen smiled at him because the next day, the name Walker was all over the news, saying that the Walker estate was invaded by evil men, leaving in the process the dead body of Mana and the bloody mess which is chibi-Allen.

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**I just want you all to know that I will be gone for, I don't know how long. But I will update my story once in a while. I just have to focus more on school since this stage should be faced seriously. Hahaha! I just wish!**

**Well, see you soon! ^_^**


	6. the pain inside

**Hmm, I should have done this a long time ago but I was so lazy to do it so, sorry for the late warnings…**

**Warning: Shounen-ai (boyxboy), Slight or major OOCness, full of the word chibi**

**AN: When Allen was still a kid, he only has his white hair so no deformed left arm and eye. After the night of the incident, his eye was changed but still no deformed hand. Thank you. And sorry for only clearing this up now.**

**Thank you for all the wonderful reviews you gave me last chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei. Yay! DGM will be back in August!**

**

* * *

I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 6: The Pain Inside**

"Mr. Walker, we've been through this for weeks and you still haven't told me anything," Komui, Allen's science laboratory and homeroom teacher said, frustrated.

Allen and Komui were left behind inside the classroom after the bell had rung.

"And as always, I will tell you again, I don't have any plans after graduation. I just want to stay at my house and wait until that day comes, I guess." Allen said, annoyed. _Really, why does Mr. Komui care what I do with my life?_

"Allen," Komui started.

"Walker, sir." Allen corrected.

"Mr. Walker, you're the brightest boy in this school, even in all my years of teaching, actually. You will just waste your talent like that. I'm just concern about your future." Komui said as he leaned backwards on the chair.

"Mr. Lee, I can take care of myself. Besides, my father left me a lot of money for me to be able to live even without working." Allen said, full of confidence.

"I just wanted to make a recommendation for you so that you will end up in a good university." Komui explained

"Sorry. But my answer is final. I don't plan to go in a university. But thanks anyway for your concern." Allen stand up and walked out of the room.

When the door was closed by Allen, Lenalee suddenly materialized behind Komui. "So, he's that stubborn. No wonder you called me here, Nii-san."

"I've been squeezing him for information without his notice but still, I can't get anything out of him." Komui said as he pinched the bridge of his nose. "If this continues, we will have no choice but to force it out of him."

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Hey Allen." Lavi said cheerfully, as he draped his arms around the boy.

"Please, Bookman-san. I'm not in the mood for jokes. Mr. Komui is bugging me these past few weeks about almost everything." Allen said as he removed the arm on his shoulder.

"Is that how you say 'thanks' to the people who waited for your Q and A to finish?" Kanda said as he leaned by the wall.

"Seriously, I never told you to wait for me. I can go home on my own. I'm not ten any…" Allen trailed off as memories when he was ten suddenly played in his mind.

"_Shiro chan! I've been waiting for you. Let's go home together." Chibi-Lavi said as he moved from his position on the wall and walked towards the approaching chibi-Allen._

"_I love to! You can then sleep in our house tonight. It's Friday so there's no class tomorrow. Besides, Mana is away at work so I don't really have anyone waiting for me there." Chibi-Allen said as his cheerful expression turned to sadness._

_Chibi-Lavi patted chibi-Allen's head. "I'll do that. Remember, Panda is also away with Mana so I can sleep wherever I want." Chibi-Lavi then removed his hand from the young boy's head and motioned it to hold chibi-Allen's hand._

"Allen, you're spacing out." Lavi said as he waved his hand infront of Allen's face.

"Huh? Oh, sorry." Allen quickly said as he realized what he was doing.

"So, what does Mr. Komui want this time?" Lavi asked as they strode towards Allen's house.

"Nothing important. He just wanted to know what my plans are after graduation." Allen said.

"And, what are your plans?" Kanda asked using his tone that says he doesn't care what Allen's answer is.

"I told him I'll just be in the house and live there until the day I die." Allen said it as if it was the most common thing to do.

Both Lavi and Kanda stopped from their tracks. They couldn't believe that those words they heard come from the mouth of Allen. They wonder what goes inside Allen's mind right now. But what disturbs the boys the most was the sweet smile plastered on Allen's face as he talked about his future.

"Allen, you can't possibly be serious. I mean, it's your future we're talking about here. You can't just say you can live alone and die." Lavi chuckled. Taking that what Allen said was just a joke.

But the truth is, Lavi was worried. He knows Allen has changed over the years but changing into someone that doesn't care about his own life is just so…

"What's wrong about that? We'll all die anyway so why work hard about something that we'll just loose in the end?" Lavi was shocked. He can't believe he's hearing those words from Allen. But before he could say anything to the boy, a loud sound was heard.

SLAP!

"When do you fucking turn into a pessimistic guy, huh?!" Kanda was angry. He doesn't want Allen to think like this. He's too innocent and pure to be like that.

Allen turned his head towards Kanda and glared at him. "What's wrong at being pessimistic? I like being this way because I don't have to expect anything from myself and if ever I fail, it will not hurt so much!" Allen then run away while holding the cheek Kanda slapped, leaving the two teens alone at the side of the road.

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"You don't know anything! Don't say like you know me completely! You're all the same! Lying to me again and again!" Allen shouted at the top of his lungs. He also throws objects that are on his reach across the room, making a mess.

The shouting, crying and throwing of things continued for hours. Almost everything in the living room was now broken. The mirror, the shelf, the couch, the tables, the curtains and all the things that was found in the living room were now broken.

"You.. don't.. know.. anything.. I'm not allowed to live a life of my own so why would I care about the future" Allen whispered between sobs, and then the boy drifted off to sleep.

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The next day, Allen didn't come to school, Lavi and Kanda were worried. But Kanda, besides feeling worried is also feeling guilty. He was the one who slapped and scolded Allen yesterday, afterall.

"Ne, Yuu-chan. Do you think he's mad because of what happened yesterday?" Lavi asked his friend as they stared at their food in the cafeteria. They don't feel hungry especially when Allen was not with them.

"How would I know? Besides, he's not the type who gets mad at people." Kanda said as if not interested.

"That's right, he's not getting mad at people whatever they do but Yuu-chan, you know were different from them. We know Shiro-chan more than anyone." Lavi said trying to reason out to his friend.

Kanda was about to say something when suddenly somebody sat beside him.

"I haven't seen Allen today. Is he sick?" Lenalee said as she started to eat.

Kanda glared at the girl. "It's none of your business. And why do you hang out with us eventhough it's obvious that we hate you."

"But, Kanda-san. Allen said that I can hang out with you guys whenever I want." Lenalee whined.

"But he's not here, so scram!" Before Kanda could push Lenalee out of the chair, Lavi had already stopped him.

"Stop it, Yuu-chan. Shiro-chan wouldn't want you to hurt her." Lavi said using a sad tone.

"Che. Whatever." The two boys then continued to stared and played with their food without getting into a conversation. They also ignored the presence of Lenalee in the table.

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"Oi! Don't just barge into someone else's home." Kanda said as Lavi entered Allen's estate without any permission.

"Don't worry Yuu. I have a spare key and I always go here every Sunday to take care of his needs so I know he wouldn't mind the intrusion." Lavi and Kanda decided that they will check if Allen is alright after class. The two can't concentrate in class because it is rare for Allen to not attend classes. So right now, the two are standing at the front door of the Walker mansion.

Click!

"Shiro-chan, are you in here?" Lavi called as he opened the door.

"Oi, moyashi. We're here to check if you're still alive."

Lavi elbowed Kanda. "That's mean, Yuu-chan. Of course he's alive."

The two teenagers walked towards the living room. Hoping to see Allen sitting on the couch, relaxing. But what they saw was not what they were expecting.

The room was in a mess. All the glass furniture and displays were broken and scattered on the floor. The couch, the mini table and the shelf were broken and have fallen on the floor. But what really catches their attention was the bloody body in the middle of the room.

"Shiro-chan!" "Moyashi!" Lavi and Kanda called at the same time as they run towards the bloody boy.

Lavi's body was shaking as he carefully lifted Allen and turned his body so that he can see his face. Lavi's mind was freaking out, it was like the night when he had found Allen and Mana's body on the same living room.

Allen's face was covered with blood and the wound he saw that day and turned into scar, was now open again. The blood was freely flowing from it and most of the blood had already dried.

Lavi's mouth was open and his whole body was strongly shaking along with Allen's which he placed on his lap.

"Oi! Snap out of it, rabbit!" Kanda shook Lavi's shoulder as he realized the boy's mind was beginning to breakdown.

"Y..Yuu.. Allen, Allen is," Lavi said as tears started to flow out from his eyes.

"Baka! The moyashi is not dead, yet. But he will be if we don't call for help now." Kanda abruptly stand up and searched for the phone. When he didn't find it, he immediately went to his back and pulled out his cellphone from it and called for an ambulance.

All the while Kanda was talking to the operator; Lavi was hugging Allen's body against his as he chanted the boy's name over and over. "Allen.. Allen.. Allen.."


	7. useless

**Wow, I didn't realize but 11 reviews in 1 chapter? It really made me happy. Thank you for all the wonderful reviews you gave me last chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei. Yay! DGM has come back but sadly Allen was only in it for 2 or maybe 3 pages. What the.. but still, we got a lot of Kanda and Allen next chapter (hopefully?)**

**

* * *

I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 7: Useless**

Lavi wasn't sure if the ambulance had made it in time. Because when they arrived at the mansion, Allen was already cold and his breathing was already shallow. They pulled Allen out of Lavi's gripped much like from that night. Lavi protested but Kanda shouted at him, "Do you want to save Allen?! Or are you just going to keep him to yourself until he dies?!"

Allen's friends followed the ambulance to the hospital. By the time they reached it, Allen was already transferred at the operating room. Lavi and Kanda waited outside the OR. Each sat at the end of the bench, far from each other. No one was speaking or moving. Both of them were tensed and worried about a certain white-haired boy's operation.

The doctor said that Allen's cut on his face was too deep that if they didn't attend to it immediately, he might not make it.

Kanda blamed himself for what was happening that time. _If I hadn't slapped him, he wouldn't have done this to himself. This would have just been an ordinary day. He would be in his depressed state but at least he's okay._

On the other end of the bench, Lavi was also blaming himself. _If I have just followed him after that incident, he wouldn't have done this to himself. I should have been there for him but instead I just let him go and walk away. I even promised myself that I would always protect him._

The sound of a door being opened and shut was heard and a man wearing a green lab suit emerged from it. Kanda and Lavi immediately stood up upon realizing that it was the doctor that was incharge of Allen's operation.

"Does anyone of you have blood type O negative? As of now, Mr. Walker is suffering from blood loss and unfortunately the hospital's blood bank can only supply 2 units of bag to the patient. It's not enough for the operation so I suggest that for you to call his relatives and ask for blood" the doctor said while calmly explaining the situation to the worried teens.

"Can't you do something about it? I don't know someone that has O negative. And his family.. his family.." Lavi said shaking with worry.

Kanda walked to his friend and placed his hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry. He'll be fine."

"Yuu.." Lavi said as he looked up at his friend.

"My blood type is O. but I'm not sure if it's positive or not. Do you think it can help?" the doctor immediately ordered Kanda to follow him inside the operating room, leaving Lavi alone in the waiting room.

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After hours of meticulous operation, Allen was put into a room followed by an exhausted looking Kanda. Allen and Kanda were put in a same room to rest while Lavi served as their guardian.

The blood extraction went well at first but Allen continued to bleed so the doctor asked for someone to donate their blood to the boy. But Kanda, stubborn that he was, volunteered to donate all the blood that he can give for the boy even though it can also threaten his life. The doctor hesitated at first but seeing the situation they are in, he was forced to take the Kanda's suggestion.

Lavi was now sitting between the two beds. His gaze went to Kanda then back to Allen. _Why can't I do something for you? Why does it always have to be someone else that saves you?_ Lavi moved his chair beside Allen's bed and moved his hand towards the younger's. He then stared at the sleeping face with a sad expression.

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When Kanda regained consciousness, he found himself lying on a bed beside Allen's. He also noticed Lavi that was resting his arms and head on Allen's bed while holding the boy's hand.

Kanda silently smiled at his friends. He was relieved when he saw that Allen was now safe and Lavi has stopped worrying and are now sleeping soundly. Feeling relived, he went back to sleep.

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It's been 3 days since Lavi and Kanda found Allen's unconscious body in his house. But still, after the successful operation, the boy hasn't woken up. Lavi and Kanda were beginning to worry. But all they can do is to wait.

Lavi had called his grandfather and informed him that Allen had an accident and is currently at the hospital. Bookman then said that he will go home as soon as possible bringing Allen's uncle with him.

Kanda on the other hand, had already regained his strength the day after the incident and is now unwillingly busy doing school work for his father.

"When are you going to wake, Shiro-chan?" Lavi asked the sleeping boy as he stroked his white hair.

Knock! Knock!

"Yes, come in" Lavi said as he lifted his head to look at the door.

Lenalee first poked his head in and seeing that Lavi was alone with Allen, went inside the room. "I've come to check Allen-kun. How is he?"

Lavi's eyes narrowed at the girl. He didn't like others calling Allen his name while he was prohibited to do so. _It was so unfair._ But he cast aside the irritation he felt to answer the girl. "As you can see, he hasn't woken up yet. But he's fine now, thank you".

"Don't mention it. Besides, the whole school is so worried about him so I decided to come and check him myself" Lenalee said as he approached Allen.

Lavi still felt uncomfortable whenever Lenalee was around but just shrugged it off from his mind seeing that the girl couldn't even hurt a fly. But sometimes, the way she looks at Allen makes Lavi's hair stand.

"Mr. Bookman, excuse me but the doctor wanted to talk to you about something. Would you please follow me outside?" the nurse said as she poked her head by the door.

Lavi met Lenalee's gaze and nod to her. "I'll leave him to you for a moment. Just call me if something came up" Lavi then followed the nurse and closed the door behind him.

Lenalee and Allen were left alone in the room. The girl surveyed the boy on the bed and all the things that are attached to his body; the IV, oxygen, pulse oximeter and catheter. Her face then suddenly showed anger but was immediately replaced by happiness when he noticed that Allen was beginning to wake.

"Finally! The prince is awake!" Lenalee cheerfully said as she sat on the chair beside the bed.

Allen slowly opened his eyes to learn that he can't open his left eye. He wondered about that and placed his hand over it and discovered that it was covered by bandages. Allen then slowly sat up and surveyed the room.

Upon seeing Lenalee, his body automatically shivered as if he was cold. _What? _"Lenalee, where am I and what are you doing here?"

"You're in the hospital, silly. Lavi and Kanda found you lying in your house and rushed you here." Allen's eye widened as memories of what happened to him that day flashed in his mind.

"It's been 3 days and the whole school was so worried. You shouldn't have done that to yourself. You're making all the people worry" Lenalee scolded.

"I'm sorry. It's just…" Allen 's mind began to wander towards his two best friends. _They shouldn't have saved me. It's much better if I just die._

Lenalee, upon realizing that the boy's mind was off to somewhere, eyed Allen angrily. "It's always you who gets everything. I really hate you." Lenalee whispered.

"What? Did you say something?" Allen asked the girl innocently.

But Lenalee just shook her head and immediately walked to the door. "It's nothing. Be a good boy and return to school soon okay? I'll be leaving now. I will get Lavi so that you won't be lonely here".

Allen body stiffened as the mention of Lavi's name. He didn't expect that he would see Lavi but now that the situation was laid in front of him, he didn't know what to do. He was so sure that he would die that moment so he hadn't thought of anything to say to the boy.

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**AAAAAnnnndddd cut!**

**Wonder what will Allen say to Lavi? Hmmm.. I wonder too. :)**

**Well, until next time.. don't forget to review okay! It will really make me happy. **


	8. Light in the Darkness

**Looking and waiting for LAVEN? This is the chapter you've been all waiting for and so far, this is my FAVORITE! And don't forget to read my A/N below.. it's really important.**

**Thanks for all the review! Especially those who never get tired to post a review every chapter! ****whisperypath****, ****Aion Laven Walker****, ****Shikamarurules1****, ****xbleedinglotusx****, ****Zenigami****, ****Ican'tDenyYou****. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei. Yay! DGM has come back but sadly Allen was only in it for 2 or maybe 3 pages. What the.. but still, we got a lot of Kanda and Allen next chapter (hopefully?)**

**

* * *

I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 8: Light in the Darkness**

Lavi's mind was flying when he followed the nurse to the nurses' station. Even when the doctor was saying about Allen's condition, his mind still would not focus on the man. Instead, all he could think of was the day when chibi-Allen regained consciousness after Mana's death.

_Chibi-Lavi decided to visit chibi-Allen after hearing the boy's condition was now stable. After days of waiting, he was now able to visit chibi-Allen. His grandfather wouldn't let him go to the hospital because of an unknown reason. Bookman told him that it was for his and chibi-Allen's sake so he obediently followed his grandfather._

_It was still a mystery to chibi-Lavi the reason he was not allowed to visit chibi-Allen. He believed that there was no danger lurking within chibi-Allen. True, the people who did it to the Walker family were not yet caught but still, he's chibi-Allen's best buddy so he should be by his side, right?_

_When chibi-Lavi was cheerfully walking towards chibi-Allen's room, he suddenly heard loud crashing of things. It was as if someone was having a fight and throwing all the things he/she could reach. He then realized that it was coming from chibi-Allen's room when a nurse suddenly emerged from the room calling for a help to another nurses._

_Chibi-Lavi dashed to the room and saw that a doctor and two nurses were pinning chibi-Allen into the bed. Chibi-Allen was holding a scissors in his hand and his left wrist was bleeding._

_Chibi-Lavi was stunned. He didn't know what to do. He didn't expect this kind of situation. He was told that chibi-Allen's condition has been stabled so, why? Why does the boy seem so confused and afraid?_

"_No! Let me go! Let me go! I want to go where Mana is! I don't want to be here! Let me go! I want to die!" chibi-Lavi's trains of thoughts were broken when he heard chibi-Allen's cries. The boy was struggling and the medical personnel were finding it hard to calm the boy down. _

_The doctor then ordered for a sedative to help chibi-Allen to calm down._

"_What happened here?!" chibi-Lavi demanded as he ran to help the nurses pin chibi-Allen down. _

"_He just suddenly became violent after I said that his father died before they were even brought here" the doctor explained._

_Chibi-Lavi's temper risen as he realized the caused of chibi-Allen's violent actions._

_Apparently, the doctor apathetically announced to a boy that his beloved father has died. He could still hear chibi-Allen's cries and feel his violent struggles._

_The door burst open and a nurse came in, holding a syringe with clear liquid in it. "Here's the sedative, doctor" the nurse said._

_When the doctor was about to inject the liquid into chibi-Allen's body, chibi-Lavi shouted, "No! Stop!"._

_The doctor stopped and looked at the boy bewildered. "He needs it to calm down"._

_But chibi-Lavi instead pushed the two nurses and hugged chibi-Allen tightly. He was having difficulty holding the boy because he was still shouting and struggling._

"_I won't let you touch Shiro-chan anymore! You're the reason why he's like this! Get out! Get out or I'll report you to my grandfather!" chibi-Lavi angrily shouted as he throw the pillow at them._

_The medical personnel couldn't do anything. Bookman has a big influence in the hospital and defiling his grandson would mean defiling Bookman himself. So without further ado, the medical personnel left the room. _

_After the medical personnel left, chibi-Allen still kept struggling from chibi-Lavi's hold. It was as if he was afraid to be touch by someone._

"_Shiro-chan, calm down. It's me. It's Aka-chan!" Chibi-Lavi said as he hugged the boy tighter._

"_No! let me go! I want to die! I want to go where Mana is! I don't want to be here when Mana is not here!" chibi-Allen countered as he pushed chibi-Lavi back._

_Chibi-Lavi felt his heart stopped for a moment when he heard chibi-Allen's words. He wanted to cry but he knows that crying would not help the situation in front of him._

"_Let me go! I said let me go! If you don't I'll stab you first then kill myself! Mana is not here anymore! I can't see with my eye like this! I should have just died! I'm all alone now! I want to die!" the scissors that was removed from chibi-Allen's hand earlier was now again on the boy's hand. He was about to stab chibi-Lavi when suddenly, he was slapped hard in the face._

"_Do you really think that you're alone now? What do you think I'm here for? Am i just a decoration to you? And are you really troubled by that eye of yours that you really want to die?! Fine then!" chibi-Lavi got hold of the scissors chibi-Allen was holding. He then pointed it at his right eye and slashed it. Blood came pouring down from it but chibi-Lavi didn't even flinch. "Now, we're the same. Do you still want to die? Because if you do, I'll definitely follow you."_

_Chibi-Allen was already stunned the moment chibi-Lavi slapped him. He was never slapped before and especially, chibi-Lavi never strikes him before. He was more stunned when he realized that chibi-Lavi was now holding the scissors at the level of his eye. He wanted to stop him but his body wouldn't move. It was as if he was under a spell and his body was not his._

"_Please, shiro-chan. Stop this. I don't want you to die. Mana wouldn't want you to die. You're not alone. I'm here so you shouldn't be afraid. I'll protect you, no matter what. I'll stay with you always. So please, please. Don't say that you wanted to die. I'll die just thinking you're not here anymore." Chibi-Lavi then hugged chibi-Allen and cried on his shoulder. _

_Upon hearing those words, chibi-Allen also cried and hugged chibi-Lavi. He still wanted to die. But if Aka-chan died because of him, he wouldn't forgive himself. So he decided to live for Aka-chan's sake._

* * *

Lavi was literally flying towards Allen's assigned room. After waiting and worrying for 3 days, Allen finally woke up. He was so happy when Lenalee told him that his unconscious friend had opened his eyes and immediately left the doctor he was talking to.

Upon arriving at the door of Allen's room, Lavi suddenly stopped. His hand is already at the doorknob but then he suddenly hesitated. _What will I tell him? Should I be distant like what he wanted or should I act what I wanted to?_

Deciding that he should first check Allen's behavior, he slowly and quietly opened the door. He saw Allen sitting on his bed. His back is leaning on the headboard and his head is turned to the window, opposite of the door's direction.

"Hey". Allen's head immediately turned towards Lavi's direction. His eye that was not bandaged was questioning Lavi.

"Why?" Allen asked. "Why did you save me? I'm not worth of your attention or your worries. I'm just a selfish brat that doesn't know how to value others even myself".

Lavi laughed at Allen's words and the boy's eyebrows immediately met at the middle. "I was really surprised that you know that you're a selfish brat, Shiro-chan". Lavi doesn't care even if lightning strike him now because all be damn. He was not going to pretend anymore. He will call Allen whatever he wanted and he will not let the boy stop him.

Lavi slowly walked towards the bed and sat down beside Allen. "I told you before and I will tell you again. _Please, shiro-chan. Stop this. I don't want you to die. Mana wouldn't want you to die. You're not alone. I'm here so you shouldn't be afraid. I'll protect you, no matter what. I'll stay with you always. So please, please. Don't say that you wanted to die. I'll die just thinking you're not here anymore."_

Allen's undamaged eye widen as Lavi's voice overlapped with chibi-Lavi's voice from years ago. He remembered those lines. It was the same lines that saved him from destroying himself. It was the same line that gave him hope and courage. It was the same line that led him to decide that he will protect the person infront of him. And those same lines are now giving him again the courage that once left him. The hope that was dissolved and the determination to protect the one he loves the most that was broken. He was whole again and it was all thanks to the man hugging and crying with him.

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**And cut! **

**Now, did I satisfy your crave for Laven? Hahaha! Hope so. But don't worry, don't worry I still have a lot of Laven under my sleeves. And about Lavi's eye. I didn't state that he had an eye patch in the previous chapters so I'm now clearing that up. Lavi have an eye patch and Allen have his scar on his face.**

**But speaking update, you may wait again for I don't know how long because my class schedule is killing me! I have 7am to 7pm classes everyday!**

**Well, until next time.. don't forget to review okay! It will really make me happy. And who knows? I might update faster if I received a lot!**

**Oh! And another thing! I wanted to ask you if want some smut or anything like that here. I don't know the age of my readers so I really can't decide. So please go to my profile and vote. Thanks.**


	9. The Start of Everything

**Happy new year everyone! Here's my New year's treat to all of you..**

**Thank you for all the people that submit a review! I really appreciated it. I thought I would get more reviews than the last time since it's Laven but well, who cares? I'm in a happy mood right now so, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei. Seriously, DGM's plot is getting dark again! Now, I hate the Order! Po~or Yuu-chan…**

**I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 9: The start of Everything**

4 months have passed since Allen was discharged from the hospital. His condition was now all back to normal. Even his eye that was damage was luckily restored to its original state. If there was something that changed in Allen's routine, it was the frequency of Mr. Komui's irritating Q and A sessions.

"Allen! Wait up. I have to talk to you." Komui said as he ran towards the boy.

"It's Walker, sir. Is it because of my recommendation to a university again?" Allen asked as he stops and faced Komui.

Lavi, Kanda and Lenalee who were walking with Allen also stopped and listened to the conversation.

"Uhm, yes and no. it's about for the graduation. It will be in 3 weeks and you still haven't told me about the occupation of your father. It was really necessary for the ceremony. So, I beg you. Please tell me all about it." Komui said almost pleading.

Lavi and Kanda show their disgust in their face. A teacher that is pleading to a student is really not their level of approval. Especially if this said teacher is terrorizing Allen.

"Why are you interested to Mana's occupation? If you were really in charge of this graduation and checked my profile, you must have already learned that my father was already dead so the information will be just useless. Unless, you are one of them?" Allen said the last line with a lot of loathing.

All the people around him shivered at the tone Allen used. They never heard Allen use that kind of tone. Even Lavi who was the longest friend of the boy was surprised.

Allen immediately\y resumed his walk when he finished saying those words. He had let his emotion show and he knows that this will definitely bring him trouble.

Lavi and Kanda followed Allen out of the corridor and out of the school while the Lee siblings remained at the spot.

"Now I know he definitely knows something. I'm not sure yet this whole time but asking that kind of question answers it all. All of our doubts were now confirmed." Komui said as he looked at his sister.

"Yes, Nii-san. He must be destroyed" Lenalee said as she smiled maliciously.

* * *

"Shiro-chan, what was that all-"

"I told you not to call me that. It's Walker. How many times do I have to tell you before it registered into your brain?" Allen said angrily, not stopping his fast paced walk.

"Sorry, sorry. I forgot. I thought it was okay now since you didn't mind me calling you shiro-chan when you were at the hospital." Lavi said teasingly.

But the teasing of Lavi only made Allen angry even more. "If you won't stop that, just leave me alone. Stay away from me!"

Allen was about to run when two different hands got hold each of his arms. "moyashi!" "Allen".

"Stop this. I don't want it to end like last time." Kanda said as he pulled Allen towards him, making Lavi's hold on Allen's arm release.

"It's.. It's not so don't worry. I won't do that again." Allen said as he bowed his head, blocking his eyes with his hair.

Lavi was panicking. He knows that Kanda was right. If he mess this up again and Allen tried to hurt himself, who knows what might happen. He might be successful this time.

"Sorry."

Allen and Kanda turned their heads towards Lavi, waiting for the man to continue speaking.

"I know I'm annoying but I was just worried. You're keeping a secret that I don't know. What do you mean when you asked Mr. Komui about being one of them? Does it have any connection to Mana? Dopes it have anything to do about Mana's murder?" Lavi asked as he stared hard at Allen's eyes.

"This got nothing to do with you two, so just give up the topic. Besides, I'm not going to answer any of your questions even if you force it out of me." Allen said as he walked away from the two.

* * *

As Allen walks alone towards his home, he can't help but worry about his friends. He didn't want them to be involved in his situation. He didn't want them to know the truth. If he can help it, he wanted them to be in the shadow, knowing nothing and living their life to the fullest. But he knows that it is impossible. The nightmare he has been having is starting to get real and it was all Komui's fault. It was all his fault. That light slip of the tongue did it all.

As son as Allen arrived at his house, he went straight to his room. And there, as he expected, he found a white envelope lying on his bed. He slowly walks towards it and picked it up. He already knows what the message is about but can't help to open it and read it. The words were the same as the last letter, letters that were coming to him everyday after being discharged from the hospital.. It was like reminding him that his time is up and they were going to get him anytime and he can't do anything but quietly follow them.

_Dear Lovely Allen,_

_ I just wanted to remind you that your time with them is coming to an end. I hope you will enjoy your last days with your friends. And don't even think about running away from me. You know you will not succeed because I am always, always watching you._

_ Until we meet._

**And.. cut! Now the real story begins after this…**

**Well, until next time.. don't forget to review okay! It will really make me happy. **

**I just remembered… my poll about whether putting a smut here or not is still open so feel free to vote! Thanks..**


	10. Back Again

**I really don't know what to say.. I'm back? Sorry? It's been months since I updated and I felt really disappointed with myself. It was the school's fault! I swear! It really ate all my time. And maybe another reason for that is the lack of DGM.. I would really like it to be on weekly issues again..**

**Anyway, I'm back for a new chapter.. I don't know if you will still read it but.. Hope you like it. 'coz it was really hard writing this one.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to the great hoshino-sensei. I can't wait for the next chapter. Go 14****th****! Take Allen away!**

**I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 10: Back Again**

3 days before the graduation, Allen, Kanda and Lavi, happily walked away from the auditorium. Their graduation practice had just ended and as usual, the three were together on their way home.

"Aka-chan.. Yuu-chan.." the two older boys that were walking a little ahead of Allen suddenly stopped at the mention of their nick names. They slowly turned their heads at Allen who were smiling shyly at them.

"Umm.. I.. I would like to invite you to go to the amusement park tomorrow since.. uhm, it's free day before the graduation" Allen shyly looked at the two who were both stunned at the moment.

Allen waited for an answer but didn't really expect it since he knows it's kind of weird to just call his friends with their nicknames after so many protests coming from him.

"So, uhm.. I think I'll see you tomorrow then? Around 8 infront of the station. Uhm.. you go ahead without me. I've got some things to do before I go home. Bye!" with that said, Allen run at full speed ahead towards the main building of their school.

Lavi and Kanda on the other hand, could only look shocked at the retreating back of Allen.

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_Now that I've finished inviting them out, I've got to finish this other business as well_. Allen was now standing infront of the faculty room and is filled with determination.

Knock! Knock!

"Excuse me. But is Mr. Komui still there?"

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Lavi and Kanda patiently waited for Allen to arrive at the station. They were anxious as to what the boy is up to.

"Yuu-chan, do you think Allen will really come?" Lavi asked as he looked at the direction where Allen is supposed to come from.

"Idiot! Of course he will." Kanda then smack Lavi by the head.

"Hey! That hurts!"

"Then don't say stupid things!" Kanda retorted.

"it's not stupid. I just thought that maybe there's something going on since Allen called me Aka-chan and you, Yuu-chan. Isn't that weird to you?" Sadness and worry is clearly present at Lavi's face as Kanda looked at his companion.

_Well, yeah. But I-_

"Aka-chan! Yuu-chan!"

Kanda's thought were interrupted as Allen happily called their names. The two boys that are waiting by the station, waved back at Allen.

"I'm really sorry for being late. I had to do something before I go and I didn't really think that it would take so much time." Allen then bowed several times while apologizing to the two.

"Nah, you're not that late. Besides, we just arrived. Right, Yuu-chan~" Kanda was about to complain when he saw Lavi winked at him.

"He's right moyashi. No need to apologize" Truthfully, Kanda and Lavi were already waiting for Allen for over an hour. But seeing that the boy really looked regretful, the two boys let it go.

"So, ready to head on to the amusement park, Shiro-chan?" Lavi placed his arm over Allen's shoulder and waited for his reply. He thought that since Allen uses their nicknames to call them, maybe he would be allowed to use Allen's nickname as well.

"Uhm, about that, there's a slight modification but don't worry. I already planned where to go."

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"Shiro-chan.. is this…?"

"Hmm? Yeah! What do you think? It fells nostalgic isn't it?" Allen said as he pulled the two towards the beach.

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_It was summer then when his grandfather decided to take him to the beach. He was told that a colleague of his wanted to take his son for a vacation and chibi-Lavi was asked to tag-along for the sake of the kid._

_The sky then was so blue that you wouldn't see any trace of the cloud floating in it. The sun was strikingly hot that it would burn your skin if you even walk under it. The sea was so calm and beautiful that it was like seducing the people looking at it to take a dip in the water despite the consequences it can do on one's skin._

_But what caught chibi-Lavi's attention was not the sky, nor the sun, nor the ocean nor the people. What caught his interest was a certain white-haired kid sitting under the shade of a palm tree._

_He quietly tip-toed towards the boy and saw that he was staring at the sea but when he saw his eyes, he was surprised to see it clouded. It was like he was in a daze._

_Chibi-Lavi coughed lightly to get the other's attention but failed. Seeing that the other boy was too much into what he is thinking, he approached him and lightly tapped his shoulder. _

_It was then that white meets red._

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"Shiro-chan, want to do something fun?" Lavi whispered to his little.

"Of course! That's why were here. To have fun" Allen said as pound his hand on his chest to emphasize it.

"Shh.. Not so loud! He will hear you" Allen eyebrow arched and looked at the place where Kanda is.

While the two were having their time playing in the water, Kanda strongly protested to join in. He said that it was a pain to dry his hair so he was going to pass. The two called him killjoy and insensitive but just let it pass. Instead, he walked towards a palm tree and leaned on it and enjoyed himself by watching the two.

"I don't think we can do whatever you are thinking, Aka-chan" Allen said as he patted Lavi on the back.

"And why do you think so, my friend?"

"Well, for one, Yuu-chan has never fallen for any of your tricks because before you could exercise the plan, you were already busted by him. And another, I think he already knows that we are up to something because he is glaring this way." Allen felt shiver run down his back as he looked back at Kanda and waved.

"Hey, I'm a genius. This time I will succeed. So here's the plan…." Lavi then relayed all to Allen about his evil plan to make fun of Kanda.

"Umm, Aka-chan, I don't think it will work" Allen said, worried.

"Don't fret. It will work. I just need you to distract him. Okay? "Lavi then looked at Allen with his eyes full of hope like it was saying that the plan depends on Allen.

Allen sighed and got up. He then walked towards where Kanda was sitting. Lavi on the other hand, started to do his evil plan.

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"Why are you here? I thought you wanted to have fun with that idiot?" Kanda said as Allen sat down beside him.

"What's the point of having fun if your not in it?"

"What? Are you lonely coz I'm not there? I here I thought that you would want to spend your day alone with that rabbit."

Allen examined Kanda for a minute before answering, "Yeah, I do. But I also wanted to spend my time with you. The both of you. And you're ruining it, you know".

The two boys remained quiet after that. Neither of them talked for while and simply started to relax and observe the surroundings.

It was almost summer and the air surrounding them feels cool upon Allen's skin. It was such a long time when he felt this relaxed.

"This is the exact place where Aka-chan and I met." Allen suddenly said. "To be precise, it was actually under this very palm tree. I brought you two here, hoping that the precious memories here will increase."

"Hmm.." Kanda said as a sign of interest.

"I can't really remember about my childhood. I know it was supposed to be that way but its different from my case. Mana said because it was due to an accident. But never mind that. Mana brought me here and that's when Aka-chan approached and befriended me."

"_uh, hello?" chibi-Lavi said as he weakly waved his hand._

_Chibi-Allen just stared at Lavi, confused as to what he should do next. Mana told him to never talk to strangers and now, one is infront of him._

_Chibi-Allen was about to stand and ran back to the cottage they were supposed to stay but the other boy grabbed his hand and turn him around._

_Chibi-Allen was now scared and started to cry. Chibi-Lavi was bewildered. He didn't expect for the boy to cry just because of what he did._

"_Waah! Don't cry. I won't hurt you. Here, I have a candy. You can have it." Chibi-Lavi offered the candy to chibi-Allen with a smile._

_But instead of stopping, chibi-Allen's cry became louder."But my father told me not to take anything offered by a stranger" chibi-Allen explained._

_Annoyed, chibi-Lavi decided to play a prank on the kid. While chibi-Allen was crying with his mouth wide open, chibi-Lavi put the unwrapped candy inside. But as soon as the red-haired boy did so, chibi-Allen immediately choked and grabbed his neck with his hands._

_Chibi-allen was now really scared. He couldn't breath and his father was not there to save him. And the worse is, the only person that can save him now is currently running away._

"What? That idiot tried to kill you? How come you're still friends with him? Are you an idiot?" Kanda said with wide eyes. He couldn't really tell if Allen is kind or what.

"Hahaha.. Don't worry. As you can see, I'm still alive. But really, Aka-chan is not that bad. He loves to play pranks at people but he takes all the responsibility with it. Just like that day. Apparently, he ran off from me to call for help. Fortunately, I'm the only white-haired kid living in the world so upon hearing it, Mana immediately came to my rescue." Allen said with a smile on his face.

Kanda just stared at Allen with a raised eyebrow. Then nudge the boy's side when he noticed that Lavi was waving at them. "It seems like he's ready to try his new prank."

"I knew you would notice. And I was supposed to distract you from it."

Allen and Kanda started to walk towards Lavi who was near the water. Kanda, who was too smart to fall for the rabbit's trap, walked slowly and positioned himself behind Allen.

Lavi was frantically waving at Allen to warn him but the latter didn't notice it for he was looking at the sea while walking. Then all of a sudden, the ground where Allen was walking on suddenly collapse and he fell in a pit. The hole was not that deep but being absent-minded while walking is really a bad idea.

Kanda peeked at the pit and almost laughed at what he saw. Allen's hands and legs were positioned above him and his back and behind were buried under the hole. It was almost like he was squeezed into a can.

"I now know the answer. You're an idiot."

**And another cut!**


	11. For the last time

**I've been getting a lot of free time lately but still, I just can't figure how to continue my stories anymore until one day, the new chapter of DGM was realeased and out of frustration, I ended up finishing a chapter. So thank you hoshino-sensei.**

**But to tell you the truth I'm getting a little detached to DGM. Why? Because I don't care what happens next anymore. The author can kill all the characters for all I care and I won't even protest about it anymore. Or maybe I was just shocked that she took out Kanda from the story?**

**Why oh why does it have to be Kanda? How could I write Yullen now? And we're getting no Laven for a long time.*sigh. I miss the old DGM.**

**Okay, now that I got it out of my system, thank you for all the reviews and favorites.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM or Allen, Lavi and Kanda and all the characters. They all belong to hoshino-sensei. **

**I Miss Your Smiles**

**Chapter 11: For the Last Time**

"So, where to next, Shiro-chan?" Lavi asked as they walked out of a clothing store near the beach, where they changed their wet clothes for next destination.

"Hm.. about that, we need to travel back into the city." Allen then smiled at the two and offered his hands for each one of them to hold.

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"Hachiko?" Lavi asked as he stared at the movie poster that was posted in the now showing area. "Hey, Yuu-chan! I think it's a Japanese word! I'm sure you will like this one!"

"Idiot. Even though I'm Japanese that doesn't mean that I would love Japanese movie. Besides, it's not about a Japanese guy. It's about a Japanese dog." Kanda points at the poster and turned towards Allen. "Are you sure this is the movie you want to see?"

"Yeah. Why? Don't you like it? I heard it's a good movie so I wanted to try it out. Come on, I already got the tickets so we better go inside." Allen took Lavi and Kanda's hands on each of his and pulled them towards the movie area.

Inside, Allen seated between Lavi and Kanda. And when the movie stared, he took hold each of their hands with his own.

"I noticed you've been holding my hands a lot today. Do you really like holding hands with me?" Kanda whispered at Allen's ear.

Allen blush deep red after hearing Kanda's comment. "Wha? I don't hold hands with you. I hold hands with both of you, Aka-chan and Yuu-chan."

Kanda chuckled at the embarrassed tone Allen was using but eventually smiled and patted his head. "I know. I'm just teasing you. You don't have to be mad."

"I'm not mad. Besides, when did you learn to be a teaser like Aka-chan?"

"Don't compare me with that idiot. I tease when I feel like it and I feel like doing it today." Kanda smirked and Allen smiled.

"Thank you." Allen then slightly squeezed Kanda's hand.

"Hey, I thought you wanted to see this movie. Shiro-chan.. You've been chatting with Yuu-chan this entire time. I'm getting jealous." Lavi whispered and pouted his lips.

Allen smiled and leaned towards Lavi. He then placed his head on Lavi's right shoulder. "Is this good enough compensation?"

"Uh.. Y-yeah.." Lavi blushed and stiffen at Allen's action but eventually relaxes as the trio focused their attention on the movie.

The movie is about an Akita puppy who was accidentally falls off from a baggage cart in train station. He was then found by Parker. The man then reported finding a dog to the authorities but no one claimed to have lost a puppy. In the end, the dog under the care of Parker

One day, Parker takes the puppy to his work, where a Japanese college professor, Ken, translates the symbol on the pup's collar as 'Hachi', Japanese for 'good fortune' and the number 8. Parker then decides to call the dog 'Hachi'.

After living with Parker for years, Hachi's routine would be to walk Parker to the train station and come back home. And in the afternoon, he would again go to the train station to wait for his master and go home together.

But one day, Hachi refuses to walk Parker to the train station, leaving the man no choice but to leave the dog behind. But Hachi tried to stop his master from going by wanting to play catch with him which he refuses to do since he was small. Parker, realizing that he was going to be late, apologizes and goes to work. Hachi waits patiently for his master to arrive at the train station but he never came because that same day, Parker suffered a cardiac arrest.

After Parker's death, Hachi continued to wait patiently for his master to arrive at the train station. Even though he was fetch by the daughter of Parker, HAchi continued to wait. The townspeople were then moved by Hachi's devotion and loyalty to his master and continued to feed him.

Several years has passed since Parker's death, Hachi continued to wait patiently. He survived by the food given to him by the people and by sleeping under a broken train carriage.

One night, Hachi makes his way to his usual spot, where he lies down and falls asleep for the last time, dreaming of his master, and later sees a vision of Parker who picks him up before their spirits rise to heaven.

Before the movie ended, Lavi noticed that Allen was shaking. Worried, he turned towards the boy and put his hand on Allen's face. He then noticed it was wet. _So, he was crying._ "Hey, Shiro-chan. It's just a movie. You don't need to cry like that."

"Aka-chan, If you were Hachi, would you still wait for your master knowing that he will never come back?"

Lavi was surprised at Allen's question but thinking that Allen asked it out of curiosity, he answered him nonchalantly. "Yeah. I think I do. Especially if I were a dog."

"I'm not talking about that. I'm asking if Parker was me and you were Hachi, would you wait for me knowing that I would never return And I'm talking about you as a human not as a dog."

Lavi examined Allen's face which was full of emotion. He couldn't even tell if the boy was serious, worried or sad. But one thing is for sure. He was a bout to cry. "Of course I'll wait for you. I'll wait for you for all eternity."

Allen lowered his head. His eyes were hidden behind his bangs. The hand which was still holding Kanda's hand hardened his grip on it and then released it as he holds Lavi's hand with both his hands. "Don't"

Lavi almost didn't hear what Allen said but his doubt was gone instantly when Allen repeated it. "Don't"

"Don't? I don't understand, Shiro-chan. Don't what?"

Allen suddenly brought his gaze up and looked straight into Lavi's eyes. "I don't want you to wait for me. I want you to move on with you life and forget all about me."

Lavi didn't know what to do or say. Allen was now openly crying. He asked for help from Kanda but the teenage boy just looked at him and nods his head.

"Okay, I promise. I'll move on. So please don't cry. You know I hate it when you cry."

Allen hugged Lavi and nodded. Lavi hugged back. "I'll move on but after I wait for you."

"But you promised" Allen protested.

"Hey! You can't expect me to just move on with my life after that. It takes time for the wound to heal. But don't worry. I'll move on. I promise. So don't worry anymore." Lavi then rubbed Allen's back to sooth him.

"Hey, how long are you going to be like that? That movie credits had ended a long time ago." Kanda said as he towered the two who were still sitting and hugging each other.

"You're such a insensitive guy, Yuu-chan. Can't you see that we are expressing our love for ea-" Lavi was then later found lying on the floor with a huge bump on his head.

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It was almost dark when the three went out from the movie house. Allen who was crying his eyes out in the theater earlier, was now again cheerful as ever. He was bouncing up and down as he slightly run and waved back at the two.

"Hurry! I want to get to our next destination."

Lavi and Kanda smiled as they walked towards the boy and holding each of his hands.

"So, where are we going next?"

Allen's eyes traveled to Kanda's face and back to Lavi. "Well, I don't really know if it was a good idea. But I really want to go there."

"Hm? What's up? Is there a problem about the place" Lavi asked worried.

"No. it's just that.." Allen released both Kanda and Lavi's hand and stood infront of the Japanese boy. "Promise me you'll go with us, okay?"

Kanda eyed Allen suspiciously. The moyashi would never force him into making promises so what place could it be. Unless…

"The answer's no. I'm not going there even if you beg." Kanda then turned around and walked towards the other direction.

"Wait! Yuu-chan! Please, come with us, I'm sure Aka-chan will behave himself this time. Besides, it will be the last time." Kanda abruptly stopped after hearing Allen say those words.

"Last time? What are you talking about, Shiro-chan?" Lavi who was oblivious of what was happening became more confused.

Allen who has his back at Lavi, turned around and smiled. "Of course it will be the last time, silly. Because after tomorrow, we won't be high school students anymore. So I really wanted us to go together to the amusement park one last time."

**And another cut!**

**See you next time! don't forget to review okay! It will really make me happy. It might even encourage me to love Yullen and Laven again.**


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